Woman or Biologist?
Wednesday, January 31, 2007
| Why do I have to choose? So often, you are one or the other and rarely both. I find myself getting more bitter on this topic as the years pass. In the beginning, education was acceptable...I might find a smart man. But with more education, the less acceptable it has become. I have now become the one that people discuss trying to pinpoint exactly what went wrong for me to want to work so hard on something like this. It seems that wanting more and working hard are acceptable.....if you are a man. Could someone explain why women with careers have to defend themselves and justify their dreams. It's apparent that I missed the memo being passed out explaining why I should only be happy when I am married and/or having children. I wish to note at this point, that I am sincerely happy for women that aspire to marry and have a family. If that is truly what you want, then I wish you the best. For me, it is not enough....I wish you could understand! When I tell you that I don't want children, it is not because I am young, or that I'll change my mind in the future. When I hear these comments, it makes me feel sorry for you.. not me. I am sorry that you don't understand that education is not a hobby, but a way of liberating who I am. I am sorry that you cannot understand that what I do makes me want to get up in the morning. And, I am really sorry that you do not have a goal that you have been striving for your entire life with every intention of achieving it, on your own. But mostly, I am sorry that you do not have a passion that makes you want to live and fight and make a difference in this world every minute of every day. For me, what I do is the air I breathe....it is who I am. We are one in the same. Success is not option, but a way of life. It makes me sad that women seem to still be fighting the same fight that was being fought decades ago. But what of the women who want both. It seems there is no one who is ridiculed and criticized more in the social eye. One must give credit to someone who can do it all. To be a provider, a chef, a housekeeper, a teacher and still be a wife at the end of the day. But now I ask how you repay these hardworking people. It is not often that you overhear a husband and wife trying to make the decision of who was going to stay home and raise the the children. I guess I am still confused about the logic that labels a woman who aspires for a career and children, as a different type of woman. Why do they have to give up one to be the other. It seems that 'we' (women that want so much more) are always having to justify and defend what we find important. Why is there a decision that has to be made. I get so angry when a child does something wrong, the first thing that people ask is "where is this child's mother?". Why is the mother to blame? Why is the father's role second? You can tell so much from the way a sentence is said more than what is in the actual words. I also find it sad that women can be grouped into two categories: working or stay at home mothers. It's as if all the world's problems can be laid at the woman's feet. If you work, you are showing your family that they are not important and they will do bad things. Is it so wrong for working women to want to add something more to their lives? I can only assume that the women who kill their children were working mothers. Is there some statistic that shows that they were trying to do both and couldn't so eliminated one of the problems? Please show me the link between the world going to hell and women working.....I think society should know before it's to late. |
Labels: Women's Issues
posted by Sonya @ 1/31/2007 03:45:00 PM,
2 Comments:
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At January 31, 2007 at 6:18 PM,
Sakshi said...
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Right on, sistah!
I don't understand why it is OK for a man to be career oriented and when a woman aspires to do it, she is automatically in the wrong.
I have been asked to rethink my decisions on marriage, kids and education for my whole life..
and a lot of times by women!
I don't get it... -
At February 2, 2007 at 4:19 PM,
said...
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So Sonya, when exactly are you gonna stop this science crap and find a nice man and have babies?
:)
